I felt like one of the Magi today. After wandering around the landscape for much of this day, I had an epiphany. I was on a phone call with a voice from the East, in which she mentioned cleaning. And lots of it. I realized this was something I was gonna do this week as well, but had accomplished very little in that regard. I then attacked the living room and part of the bathroom. And I felt much better for doing that.

Meal of Links

The DVR is a wonderful thing. Took a rare Friday at home to catch up on some stuff and I was able to see the rerun of Christopher Hitchens on C-Span from October. They had him on a 5:00 a.m. timeslot, but the phone lines were jammed. He admitted he stayed up all night and it was easier in many ways than coming on at, say 7:00 or 8:00 a.m.

I will finalize my picks for the Dead Pool tomorrow, but this Dick Clark thing bothers me. Without any clearcut video evidence, I may have to leave him off, but then again, this could be his goodbye to America. I am currently perplexed.

The funniest names in college hoops. Parfait Bitee makes me laugh. I think Jazz Henderson sounds pretty damn cool.

This old-timer bowls a perfect game, third time for him, then drops dead. As my niece says, "That's not funny!". What is funny is the quote from fellow kegler Johnny Masters, "If he could have written a way to go out, this would be it." Thanks, Johnny, perhaps Ed would have preferred to celebrate the 300 game after he left the lanes. At home, maybe? At least a few minutes. And it sounds like the coffee at Airway Lanes needs an adjustment.

Exercise Yard

I almost spit up my sauerkraut during dinner today when I saw the ESPN News crawl, which stated Phil Savage might be fired. Huh? What? I hopped on the phone right away and my sources couldn't shed any more light on it. "Philosophical differences due to salary cap issues". That has a "diminishing skills" nuance to it. You see something like that and you wonder how dysfunctional is this organization? Savage not even lasting a year, who would have thunk that? Of course, the Browns are denying it, but picture the siren on Drudge and mark it developing...

Visitor

43 Across: Songwriter Warren honored on the album "Enjoy Every Sandwich" (5 letters) Answer: Zevon

My Dad's birthday is on Sunday, which is also New Year's Day. I asked him how old he is gonna be and he said 75. All I could tell him was, "Man, that's a whole lotta birthdays." And he agreed. I took him over to the Union House for lunch yesterday. They have a fish fry (my choice) and pierogis (his choice, and there's that word again!) on Wednesdays and Fridays. You could tell it was the holiday season and it was raining, because even the old timers weren't there.

Still narrowing the choices for Amateur Night, a.k.a. New Year's Eve. Several joints currently in the running. The decision will be made soon.

Meal of Links

Times Square festivities will have a Nawlins feel to it. He said "Ball drop." heh heh heh heh

Looks like rain for the Tournament of Roses parade. Does anyone watch that anymore? I see CBS bailed this year.

Enron's chief bean counter pleads guilty and will testify against Lay and Skilling. BTW, Skilling's lawyer is Dan Petrocelli from the OJ civil trial, in case you don't have a program with a current roster. It's funny, because back then he was a good guy and I'm sure he'll come off as a bad guy during this trial.

Exercise Yard

Watch the play at the end of the Alamo Bowl last night. The Wolverines got hosed on several fronts. No flag on Nebraska for running on the field, some of their own players quit on the play, and one more lateral would have enede the play with a TD.

Visitor

5 Down: Friendship 7 astronaut (5 letters) Answer: Glenn

It's the Scared of Santa gallery.

Jon Stewart will host the Oscars this year. I've got a feeling.

Peppermint Bark is the new confectionery crack.

Demjanjuk? I thought he was dead.

Meal of Links

With the year 2005 coming to a close, a lot of us look back at what goals we set and how we have done. Here was a noble goal for one individual. A quest to drink in 1000 bars during the year. And he's really close to doing it.

Time to make the donuts. In heaven. I was at a Dunkin' this a.m. Got there and the line was out the door. Folks love that coffee.

Scene: It's raining. If you run fast, will you be drier or wetter? Unless it's Noah-like, I always walk.

Exercise Yard

The KO of the Year. If you have not seen it, find a tape somewhere. I thought he was dead. Honestly, I thought he was killed. Right there on my HDTV.

Visitor

40 Across: Ticklish Muppet (4 letters) Answer: Elmo

I saw "Munich" today. I wasn't overly thrilled with the result. I think it's a fascinating story and they could have done a lot more with it. Eric Bana was really good in it, recovering from his "Hulk" experience. Basically, it was a story where people roamed the earth killing each other, hoping not to get killed. There, I saved you 2 hours and 44 minutes.

Plus, I got to sit near heavy breathing, hacking, talk-out-loud lady. I should have followed the hot chick and her mother (who bitched about the price of the matinee for seniors) to the "Geisha" movie.

Meal of Links

Would you have any qualms about living in a nuthouse? Here's your opportunity.

DVD trends. "Donny and Marie" debut next year. Can't imagine anyone buying that. Check that, I know one person who will buy that.

The Japanese Uncle Joe bowls for 11 hours. Then he doesn't pay.

Exercise Yard

The Cavs are starting to get some pub. They are hot right now, but let's see if the defense holds up.

Visitor

9 Down: Photographer Adams (5 letters) Answer: Ansel

I had a very nice holiday and was overwhelmed by the generosity of everyone, as I received some very nice and thoughtful gifts. But I think I'm suffering from one of those trends, because I got zero books this year, which was a first. Oh, I'm going to read a book that I discarded as a present idea and I did get to borrow the Godfather revisited book, so I do have plenty to read. Maybe it's tougher to shop for books, I dunno. Regardless I'll look into some purchases.

Meal of Links

There will be an extra second on December 31st. Why it didn't happen right this second, I do not know.

Grapefruit fights gum disease. I miss grapefruit, because I'm not allowed to eat it, per medication.

Kwanzaa begins today. I like the stamps.

Exercise Yard

The Indians sign Jason Johnson. Not a bad pitcher, but I think his claim to fame is he's one of the few diabetics in the league. He wears a monitor when he pitches.

Visitor

37 Across: Painter Edouard (5 letters) Answer: Manet

With my favorite Christmas song playing in the background, "Grandpa's Last Xmas" by the Vandals, let's sing along:

Mom Says, "Put on your Christmas best."
Grandpa's coming down this year and it might be his last.
Why Mom? You say that every time.
It seems that he's been dying ever since I was nine.
I don't mean no disrespect because he's old and mean.
But how come we invite him when he always makes a scene?

Tell me, Why Does, he hit me with his cane?
And why should I get him a gift if he doesn't know my name?
How come, he always calls me "Kate"
and forgets his dentures on his dinner plate?
This could be Grandpa's last Christmas
That's what Mother said.
This could be Grandpa's last Christmas
And soon he might be dead, so be nice.

What can I say to someone 300 years old?
When he seems so content staring at the jello mold.
Please Mom, let me go out and play
or soon I will go deaf like him from hearing him complain.
I know, his life's been long and hard
but he deserves some quiet and peace in a nice graveyard

Grandpa, I love you just the same
But I know that you won't be happy until you drive us all insane
This could be Grandpa's last Christmas
That's what Mother said.
This could be Grandpa's last Christmas
And soon he might be dead, so be nice.
be nice...to Grandpa...cuz he's old....and he smells,
and he's gonna die soon...be nice to Grandpa
















Merry Christmas!

Randomness from today's Browns home game:

Due to several cancellations for a myriad of reasons, I found myself going solo to today's Browns game. Browns Version 2.3 was coming off an uninspiring win over the Raiders. The opponent: Hated rivals, the Pittsburgh Steelers. Going in, the plan was to see how long I could take it. If it was a good game, I'm in for the duration, if it was a shitty game, I'm out. Quickly. Before the game, I did my version of "Sunday, Bloody Sunday". Except it was Saturday and I had lots of Bloody Marys. I mean lots. So I felt pretty good going to the game.

The weather was highly unusual for December. Sunshine early, a bit overcast. The temperature zooming towards 45 degrees.

The giveaway: The Browns put on the Scrooge hat and gave away nothing.

Not many smells, except that of the Browns defense, offense and special teams.

The Browns are not a very good team. A game like today points that out in spades. The atmosphere was electric before the game. Football is a sport like no other because of the buildup to the start of the game. The Steelers come out and everyone starts booing and then a few Browns come out of the tunnel and you hear these waves of cheers rumbling through the park. It's pretty cool. The Browns then chose to introduce the special teams, which I've always considered a buzzkill. Fans don't get charged up watching the introduction of Mason Unck. Then the game had to start. Aye carumba.

The G.E. Smith Band was in session. The tune in the spotlight was "Jingle Bell Rock".

Tame crowd in Section 345. Although it amazes me that even when we are getting our asses handed to us, Browns fans will continue to shout, "Pittsburgh Sucks", as if it somehow demonstrates superiority.

Best line from a random (I have no idea the context of why this was shouted): "Are you male or female?"

Oddest Browns jersey: 54 ANDRADAVIS with no space between ANDRA and DAVIS.

Best shirt: OK, I laugh when I see Spongebob flipping off people with "Fuck Pittsburgh".

I actually bought a hot dog that wasn't bad.

The Village Idiot, Jeff Tanchak, got his mike problems fixed and wished everyone a "Merry Christmas".

Best Browns play: Still waiting.

Too many Terrible Towels were waving today. Looked like the home crowd dumped lots of tickets to their Steeler brethren.

Best Fan Cam picture: A female holding a sign that read: "My boyfriend is a Steelers fan...so I left him at home."

Worst stat: The Browns had 22 yards in the first half.

2nd worst stat: The Browns attempted to throw on first down on five of their first six possessions.

3rd worse stat: The Browns offense totalled 178 yards, while the defense gave up 457.

The Browns suffered an old fashioned ass whuppin' today. If there was a bright spot, I failed to see it. The Browns lose an ugly one, 41-0, go to 5-10, and wrap up the season next week with the home finale against the Ravens. BTW, I left at halftime and arrived in front of my HDTV to see Willie Parker bust one up the middle for 80 yards.

Meal of Links

Bin Laden's niece is in GQ. The result: A very funny Fark thread.

You knew that Christmas sales were disappointing, didn't you? The Browns can't stop the run and Christmas sales are always disappointing.

Mariah Carey ties Elvis Presley with her 17th No. 1 single. Doesn't seem right.

Exercise Yard

Mark Cuban has a statistical analysis of back-to-back games in the NBA. Needless to say, most teams are not very good in Game 2.

Visitor

14 Down: TV financial advisor Suze (5 letters) Answer: Orman

I absolutely love eggplant. I had some last night after the CSU game at Giovanna's and once again, it was outstanding. We got there 5 minutes before the kitchen closed and in the nick of time, got served. Can't say enough about it.

CSU beat on John Carroll last night, as they should. When you have a Division I versus Division III matchup, a pounding should take place. And it did. CSU won, 84-53.

Meal of Links

Chan Ho Park in compromising positions. Seriously, Chan Ho Park in compromising positions. Gots to love the Internets.

Sure, it's sophomoric, and yes, it's juvenile. But they found more rings around Uranus.

Is George Bush drinking again? Here's the proof, so to say.

Exercise Yard

Johnny Damon goes to the Yanks. I'm guessing he wasn't Jesus after all, but more of a Judas. I am a little surprised at the reaction though. It is tough to turn down that kind of money. However, the Yankees just signed a 32-year old centerfielder who can't throw. This has shades of the slide of Bernie Williams all over it.

On another note, Elrod Hendricks passed away on Wednesday. This is just a beautifully written tribute to the guy.

Visitor

24 Down: '80s "This Old House" host (4 letters) Answer: Vila

We went to the Winking Lizard for lunch today. They had all sorts of signs around for something called Navan. Of course, we started referring to it as "Navin", as in Navin R. Johnson. Anyhow, the waitress decided that we deserved a sample.

It's not for me. I found it a bit nutty. Probably would taste well over some ice cream, but not to spend all night sipping.

Meal of Links

Christopher Hitchens rips on Christmas. He refers to reindeer as "that plague species". I love that guy.

Bobby Brown tells everyone that Santa Claus doesn't exist. Then he changes his mind and says, "I'm Santa Claus."

Terry Pluto checks in with a personal Christmas story. Lump-in-throat time.

Exercise Yard

We all know who's birthday it is on Sunday. Why it's Ed Hochuli, of course.

Visitor

51 Down: Hall of Fame quarterback Baugh (5 letters) Answer: Sammy

I need to visit the Target in Kent more often. I was investigating a panic buy situation, because I really liked the looks of this wool coat I had seen in the Parma store about a month ago. I thought I'd stroll over to the Kent store at lunch, when it wasn't so crowded to see if they had one there. Well, they did and it was the last one. I didn't want to hide the coat in a different section, and I convinced myself to buy it now and not wait until after Christmas.

So, where do end I up? Of course, in a line. At the Express checkout, of all places. All of a sudden, this Target worker (I think she was the head cashier) sees me in line and proceeds to give me the heavy flirt. Right there in the Target. She insists that I keep the hanger for the coat (whoa, that's a first) and then tells me they don't have any garment bags, but proceeds to find something for me. She gets this large bag and expertly pokes a hole (OK, author embellishment) in the middle for the hanger I get to keep. Then she says, wow, this coat looks great. She sees how much it costs and then tells me what a great deal it was, that if I had gone to Nordstrom or Kaufmann's, I would have paid a ton more, but that the quality there was just as good. That it'll look good on me and on and on.

I'm still in line, because while all this was going on, the dude in front of me finished, but they had to take this woman who had bought all of her stuff before, but must have needed a new price for a Mr. Coffee. The cashier asked if I would let her go ahead of me and I said sure. And this new transaction takes forever, because we are standing, obviously, in the Express checkout line. Just then, my new friend reappears on the other side of the conveyor, grabs my wrist and mouths the words, "I am so-o-o-o sorry."

So, I have to go back. I mean, it is the store where I buy my underwear, so I guess I'll wear my new coat and buy a pack.

Meal of Links

It's not Pink Floyd, but David Gilmour hits the road.

Graphics of all the uniforms worn by Gaylord Perry in his Hall of Fame career. He was with the Tribe during the blood clot era.

Macworld is coming soon. And that means more Apple rumors this time of year.

Exercise Yard

Hey, Cleveland State won another game yesterday. My Dad and I attended the overtime thriller (not really) between CSU and the vaunted Wolverines of Utah Valley State. I think the depth of CSU helped as Utah Valley kinda got worn down in the second half, by not using the bench too much. But the Vikings made a nice 13-point comeback to tie it at the buzzer and then jumped ahead in overtime to hang on for the win.

The coach of Utah Valley was Dick Hunsaker, not known as a gentle guy. You may remember him from the Ball State glory days in the early '90s. After the game, he was really yelling at some CSU officials by the scoring table. Not sure what his beef was, but I thought he might of come to blows, if not watched. There was an absolutely horrible non-call late in the game that CSU was not whistled for, so maybe that was it.

Visitor

33 Down: Former U.N. leader Hammarskjold (3 letters) Answer: Dag

Jeezy creezy, is it cold today. I happened to see the Falcons-Bears game from Chicago last night and it was bitterly cold there, as well. The Falcons coach, Jim Mora, Jr., did not have a hat or gloves on. All I could think of was his poor mother screaming at the TV, "Where's your hat? It's freezing outside." No time to be macho.

Meal of Links

Pete Doherty got arrested again. He has a long way to go to rival Henry Earl, who looks like he may spend the holidays in jail. Once more.

Woody Allen dismisses his own work as "mediocre". I think that's a mite self-critical.

Dick Cheney crawls out of his spider hole and visits Iraq. Things must be going well regarding security over there (he says facetiously), because they didn't even tell the Prime Minister that Cheney was coming. I guess the guy walks in and Cheney yells "Surprise!"

Exercise Yard

F1 champ Fernando Alonso moves to McLaren for 2007. He's 24, already a champ, and he'll make millions on the deal. Life is good.

Visitor

7 Down: Ward of "Sisters" (4 letters) Answer: Sela

I saw "King Kong" today the way it should be. At 10:05 a.m. on a Sunday morning, because the crowd is scarce, you can take in a bagel for breakfast, and sit on the aisle to take the inevitable bathroom break during this three-hour epic. And still have lots of the day to do stuff. BTW, the trailers seemed to be for all the movies that debut in May 2006. Anyhow, "Kong" was really, really good, one of the best of the year. And you get to call him a big ape a lot, as well.

I'm not sure the kiddies can take it, because you get a lot of attacks by dinosaurs, bats, really creepy crawlers, and your typical man-eating worms, etc. And the natives are restless, as they usually are in a jungle picture. Of course, one character was reading "Heart of Darkness" and I swear I saw Martin Sheen lurking in the background ready to take down Marlon Brando. At least, I think it was him. So, it is a bit intense, at times. But it is a great ride. Do not, I repeat, do not make reservations for Skull Island. I know the brochures talk a good game, but only if you wanna remake "Run Lola Run" while you're there.

Fine performances by everyone. Jack Black (keeps shirt on) and Adrien Brody (takes shirt off) are terrific. And Naomi Watts is photographed so beautifully in this movie, it's scary. I can't recall the last time I saw an actress whose beauty was captured like that. Stunning. And she runs. A lot. Supporting cast is great, especially Kyle Chandler and the crew on the boat. Definitely worth viewing on the big screen.

Meal of Links

Time picks three Persons of the Year. Make up your mind.

Cellphone usage while driving is on the increase. I know I didn't grow up with the technology, but way too many people, self included, do not pay attention while talking on the road. But there isn't a whole lot we can do about it.

Really Bad Santas rampage Auckland. Hey, isn't there an opening at Great Northern Mall?

Exercise Yard

The Browns blow a draft pick by beating Oakland today, 9-7. I'm all for the Browns winning, but this win could drop us from around 6th to about 13th for next year's draft pick. Not much to say, as it was a typical game between two 4-9 teams. The Browns didn't average theee yards a rush and we gave up (ahem) another 100-yard rusher in Lamont Jordan. But an early missed field goal and a blocked field goal late in the game helped keep the Browns in it. Then Charlie Frye engineered a drive for the winning field goal with no time left. Sounds like it should have been exciting, but it really was a dull game.

Visitor

None, it's a "King Kong" of a Sunday.

Man, what a busy day today. I had to get off my ass and actually do some live Christmas shopping, which means visiting malls and other establishments I don't particularly like spending time at. I was fairly successful obtaining items, so it wasn't all bad. But when you always end up behind "Clueless" and "Numbnuts" while traversing the landscape, I don't like it very much.

The hardest part was getting going. Because last night was the annual Alesci's Chrsitmas party. And that typically ends up with me being a pile in the morning. But for some reason I got a head start on piledom, as I felt I achieved that last night. And I had to blame the Jello shots, because Canada was unavailable. Del was handing them out, so I guess they were "Dello" shots. They had red ones and green ones. I took a shining to the green ones and later mixed in some reds. I believe it was 6-2 in favor of the greens. Only later in the evening was I told that the greens were tequila and the reds vodka. I am not particularly fond of tequila. This exercise reinforced that. Combined with bourbon and some of those vodka-soaked cherries, I was um, oh, what's the word? Inebriated.

Best line of the party: "Yeah, I finally got my girlfriend to leave me. You'd think by me drinkin' massive amounts of alcohol and smokin' lots of pot, it would have given her a hint."

Meal of Links

Polar bears are drowning because of warmer temperatures. Hasselhoff gets the call.

The top grossing tours of 2005. Of course, U2 is first with the Rolling Stones close.

Bush says he'll continue to eavesdrop, because he wants people to remain scared. And that means they'll accept anything. Just put the terrorist label on it, and it's all good.

Exercise Yard

Don't look now, but the Patriots are back. They have become the team you do not want to play in the playoffs.

Visitor

18 Across: Manager who won five straight World Series (12 letters) Answer: Casey Stengel

Went to lunch today at the local Chinese restaurant close to where I work. It's the standard-issue buffet place where someone dips the white rice shovel onto their plate that already has sauce on it, then proceeds to put that shovel back in the rice maker, so everyone avoids the rice that has the sauce on it. You know, like burrowing down one side of a jar of peanut butter. It's a place where we ask the waitress if they have Pezzy or Coke. The kind of place that has "Mustar Sauce" for your egg rolls. Need I say more?

Why, yes and I will. It was the first time the check came without any fortune cookies. I've always felt that some company made the fortune cookie delivery say, in 1962, and stocked enough until the year 3000 and beyond. So, we were very surprised we came up empty. What is the proper etiquette? We started looking at other tables to see if they stumbled upon the same fate. Do you ask the staff and risk some ancient Chinese secret about fortune cookie inquiries? Do you not leave your table, hoping they recognize their mistake? Do you continually order more Pezzy, or in this case, Coke?

Trust me, it's very difficult to leave without knowing what my 5 newest lucky numbers were or what the Chinese word for lampshade is.

Meal of Links

It seemed like a good name at the time.

I have nothing to do with this site. Although, I am very much in touch with the concept.

No, I've never been spirited away to faraway lands and galaxies, even while listening to early Rush albums. But if I was taken away, I would really cherish this gift.

Exercise Yard

The largest steroid bust ever took place the other day. Lots of people arrested. Raffy Palmiero seen pointing a finger.

Visitor

38 Down: Mayberry boy (4 letters) Answer: Opie

A tip of the hat to the folks at Scene and the Free Times for getting their respective editions online much sooner than they had been. Sometimes I can't get a hardcopy and I was getting irritated that the online version was old news (Free Times, especially) by the time I'd get to it. The last several weeks they have been online quickly.

Having said that, the Free Times wasted a lot of ink with the cover story on Vonda Ward. Let me say I am one of the dying breed who actually watches fights on TV. And I've seen some live events, as well. I saw Ward fight two years ago at the Gund, and she was awful. Oh, she had some sort of belt that was sanctioned by God knows who, but that was strictly because of her competition or lack thereof. I don't like awful bouts and unfortunately for female boxing, almost all of the bouts are subpar.

If she ever fights Laila Ali, I'd watch, but I just can't see that being an even match. And I'm a guy who supports the locals, but in this case, it's tough to do.

Meal of Links

Jimmy Page gets an OBE for charity work. For a treat, listen to Zeppelin's older stuff to remember what a virtuoso he was.

We know about the shortage of nurses in the US. But we tend to overlook the lack of school nurses.

Lots of controversy surrounds free Wi-Fi for New Orleans. BellSouth allegedly withdrew an offer to house police HQ in one of their buildings, because of the competition. This is one of the few services that the city can activate quickly, unlike basic gas, water and electricity functions.

Exercise Yard

The story of the Redskins' Antonio Brown and why he was blowing all those kisses to the crowd when he scored the other day. An unbelievable example of perseverance.

Visitor

17 Across: Shortstop who won 13 Gold Glove Awards (10 letters) Answer: Ozzie Smith (not Omar, who has 12 letters and 10 Gold Gloves)

I started to catch up on some Christmas stuff this week, because I felt I had been falling behind. I made my online blitz last night, so hopefully the packages get here on time. It's tough to get going, because we are busy at work trying to finish some things before the holidays. But I have to get my out of town cards sent out soon, so I have to make time for that.

Meal of Links

The best of the 2005 Newspaper Corrections. Some of these are pretty choice.

Add Bob Dylan to the list of XM Satellite Radio show hosts. I wonder if we'll be able to understand him.

A large shareholder wants Wendy's to spin off some brands, including Tim Horton's and Baja Fresh. Nelson Peltz has a strong track record and they should probably listen to him.

Exercise Yard

Today is the anniversary of the NBA's highest-scoring game in its history. OK, it took 3 overtimes, but a combined 370 points is amazing. The stat sheet has some incredible numbers. Only 2 three-pointers were made. Detroit had only 13 turnovers. Kelly Tripucka tosses in 35 and he's the FIFTH highest scorer in the game.

Visitor

1 Across: Hemingway sobriquet (4 letters) Answer: Papa

OK, I think the weather folks missed this snow forecast today. One to two inches tonight was actually about 4 or 5 inches today. They haven't been very accurate lately. They can shove Doppler up their collective ass as far as I'm concerned. Thank goodness, it was fluffy. There were kids strolling around asking if they could shovel, I told them maybe next time. I figured while I was already out, I might as well continue.

Meal of Links

I'm not sure if you are aware that editorial cartoonists are a dying breed in this country. The Tribune Co. has jettisoned some cartoonists lately. Today was "Black Ink Monday", whereby a bunch of cartoonists drew their opinion on the matter.

The scoop on the Paramount-Dreamworks deal. Hard to figure out what it all means.

Angelina Jolie's lesbian lover says Ange will never be a housewife. And who's asking her to do that anyhow?

Exercise Yard

I cannot fathom Roger Clemens returning to the Red Sox. I'd say that ain't gonna happen.

Visitor

18 Down: Composer Jerome and others (5 letters) Answer: Kerns

I survived the U2 concert last night at Quicken Loans Arena. I thought it was a great show. I guess the question is was it worth $175 a ticket? I'd have to answer in the affirmative. I mean we spent the money for the show so long ago, you forget you even had it. You could carve out tickets to several other shows for that same price, but I've been seeing that band for so long, you have to go. Others are fanatical about Springsteen, I guess U2 is it for me.

The show had the same setup as last time where they have a ramp that encircles the folks in front of the stage. Same video setup up top where each band member is filmed almost exclusively on four screens. And Dan Gilbert does not hesitate to pay the heating bill at the Q, because it was kinda hot in there. And I'd say the average age of the attendees skewed older.

The setlist had a mix of the old and the new, with emphasis on some Beatles covers. I though it offered enough for any newbies out there, while satisfying the old-timers. It was a very gratifying show and I'll probably pay a record price the next time they show up.

Meal of Links











The death of Richard Pryor brings back lots of memories. I haven't seen his concert films lately, but I was fortunate to see them in the theater so many years ago. Truly one of the funniest and most influential comedians of our time.

I absolutely loved one of his bits from the live films. It's the one where the mean dog who lives next to Pryor decides to cut Richard some slack because he sees that he's down. So when the dog goes back to his house, he turns around and tells Richard to not get the wrong impression, he'd be back after his ass tomorrow. Very funny. The kids today don't know it, but he was a genius.

Why the music industry doesn't like saving songs off a satellite receiver. Thought I'd reference this instead of the constant stream of "Stern goes to satellite radio" articles.

Sydney comes up with a new twist on racial unrest. Beach riots!

Exercise Yard

All you can say about the Browns game today was that the food was good. Crabcakes, yes! They did play a competitive game, but there were three things that cast doubt on the coaching staff again.
For one series that Reuben Droughns sat out, Maurice Carthon called for three straight passes, resulting in a three and out. With one second remaining in the first half, with the ball on the Browns 45, Frye took a knee. Should have been a Hail Mary, you may get a penalty. The timeout taken after the Browns had escaped without having a charged timeout (because of an injury on what was subsequently ruled an incomplete pass) in the final minute of the game was unbelievable. So much time had elapsed during a booth replay and Leigh Bodden being tended to, the strategy should have been determined.

Two penalties on Bodden in the last minute didn't help. First one was highly questionable. The second looked like Bodden pushed Chad Johnson within the 5-yard zone, but the ball was in the air. The Browns, edging further up the draft order, lose 23-20.

Visitor

None, it's Sunday.

Ended up at the Old Angle last night. All of a sudden, we were transported back to a late 70's music festival. The sad fact is most of that music was terrible, but I knew lots of the words. Too many of the words, I'd say. I think the most godawful song had to be "You Make Me Feel Like Dancin'" by Leo Sayer. What a goof that guy was. I think he had a couple of other hits like "Long Tall Glasses" and "When I Need You", which I thought I had completely erased from my memory.

Now that I think of it, "Undercover Angel" was equally as bad. And I think that went to Number One. Ugh. I'd bet that Merv Griffin sang that on his show. Of course, after "On and On" for the 500th time.

Meal of Links

Killing time while waiting for U2 this evening, I went to see "Jesus is Magic", Sarah Silverman's movie. I really wasn't offended by anything she said, but I wish they had filmed only her stand-up act. The performance pieces they mixed in were a bit lacking, to be kind. The film was only 72 minutes long and had severe padding going on. But she is funny. Definitely a "wait for cable" effort.

The US is still alone when it comes to the Kyoto Protocol. Global warming aside, I've been really cold lately.

If you ever wondered about bunny suicides, here is your answer. Ingenious little creatures.

Exercise Yard

An excellent piece on the resignation of Gary Barnett, the Colorado football coach. If the previous administration had any backbone, he would have been out well before these last two losses.

Visitor

7 Down: His epitaph reads "That's all folks!" (8 letters) Answer: Mel Blanc

I noticed the brewers of Iron City Beer (not a favorite of mine) filed for bankruptcy. They hadn't paid their water and sewer bills since 1996. I don't know how these companies, let alone individuals, can go that long without meeting their obligations. Obviously, I can see a few payments here and there, but nine years? Anmazing.

A couple of months ago, Marion Berry entered a plea of guilty of not paying taxes since 1999. Taxes! And he got re-elected last year. I guess it eventually catches up with you, but that's unbelievable.

Meal of Links

Another addictive game. This one is of the holiday variety. It's called Speedy Santa. My best was 9.716.

This "Rocky Guy" made me laugh. The weigh-in at the market is too much.

Christopher Robin becomes the new Roebuck. Replaced by a six-year old girl. "Pooh, promise you'll never forget me, ever." Maybe he turned 101.

Exercise Yard

The scoop on MLB's winter meetings. The Tribe gets Paul Byrd. Meh. Wickman comes back for his farewell tour and that's OK. We gotta get another bat.

Visitor

48 Across: He coached Kentucky to 876 victories (4 letters) Answer: Rupp

I compiled the finishing touches on this year's Christmas CD, "The Whoville Mix". I think I've got some pretty good stuff on it. So, if you want to know I've been listening to lately, here it is:

Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town/Bruce Springsteen (gulp!)
Santa Lost a Ho/The Christmas Jug Band
Happy Xmas (War is Over)/The Alarm
Lonely Christmas Eve/Ben Folds
Let's Make a Baby King/New Grass Revival
Baby, It's Cold Outside/Carmen McRae and Sammy Davis,Jr.
Santa's Messin' With the Kid/Lynyrd Skynyrd
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer/Jack Johnson
Sock It To Me Santa/Bob Seger
Jingle Bells/Diana Krall
Must Be Santa/Brave Combo
Sleigh Ride/Los Straitjackets
Is Zat You, Santa Claus?/Big Bad Voodoo Daddy
Toy Sack/Bob Rivers (Think "Love Shack")
Just Call Me Scrooge/Fishbone
Snoopy's Christmas/Smash Mouth
Merry Christmas (I Don't Want To Fight Tonight)/The Ramones
It's Christmas Time Again/Gridlock
Merry Merry Merry Frickin' Christmas/Frickin' A
Christmas Baby, Please Come Home/Jon Bon Jovi (double gulp!)
Fairytale of New York/The Pogues and Kristy MacColl
Christmas Is the Time to Say I Love You/SR-71
Twelve Days of Xmas/Relient K

I like them all, but that Pogues lyric, where Kristy sings "You're a bum, You're a punk.", and Shane replies with "You're an old slut on junk." really puts you in the holiday spirit.

Meal of Links









Greyhounds are cool.

It seems like the mentions of Pearl Harbor Day are less and less as more of the vets of the Big One die off. And that's a damn shame.

Ricky Gervais has a podcast on Guardian Unlimited. Give it a listen.

Exercise Yard

The Padres re-sign Trevor Hoffman. It might be Danny Baez coming back in a trade to solve the closer problem. Oops, I just found out Wickman signed up for one more year with the Indians. I gotta believe he told Shapiro that he was gonna give it a go for one more year and if the Tribe needed a longer commitment from someone else, he was cool with that.

Visitor

68 Across: Lott of Mississippi (5 letters) Answer: Trent

I took my new toy, the Tao XM2Go out for a test ride tonight and didn't end up in a ditch. I strolled over to the bank and it worked pretty well. Stuck it in my pocket and had no sound breaks at all. The signal was pretty strong outdoors and I even got to sing with Aimee Mann on the way back. I like it.

Meal of Links

"No justice, no peace" results in a Stevie Wonder appearance at the Super Bowl pre-game. The sad truth is most of the Motown greats are gone and the remaining acts are shells of the originals.

Uh-oh. Gazza's in trouble. Again.

The New Oxford American Dictionary picks podcast as word of the year.

Exercise Yard

Tie Domi's Fight Card. It only goes back to 2000 (why?), but does contain some obvious names that Domi traded punches with. Like Berube, Brashear and Barnaby. Not that Barnaby, I'm talking about the hockey player.

Visitor

39 Across: Actress Basinger (3 letters) Answer: Kim

Randomness from yesterday's Browns home game:

My cousin Ron was the day's special guest. Browns Version 2.3 was coming off a putrid performance against the Vikings, but this game marked the debut of Charlie Frye as the starting QB. The opponent: The Jacksonville Jaguars. The last time they visited was in 2001 for "Bottlegate". I also had Bloody Marys before I went to confession that day, but that's a story for another time.

The weather was typically December. A clipper blew in about 4-6 inches of fluffy snow in the a.m. It was cold and not that windy. Plenty of sunshine late in the day.

The giveaway: Finally, a freebie! The local Chevy dealers ponied up some cash and supplied all of us with brown Santa hats.

Not many smells, because of the cold.

The Browns defense did them in yesterday. Charlie Frye did pretty well with the vanilla offense they gave him. It seemed we were stuck in a pattern of 1st and 2nd down runs and 3rd down passes. Frye and Braylon Edwards have some sort of weird connection. I don't know what it is, but they match up extremely well in the passing game, and Edwards had two TDs. Defense played pretty well in the first half, awful in the third quarter, and OK at the end. Orpheus Roye dominated his man all day. The killer was David Garrard running for 28 yards on a 3rd-and-19 to kill any chance at a win. He's a QB and we didn't have a spy on him. What were they thinking?

The G.E. Smith Band may have been there. But I have an Adidas winter hat that blocks out all G.E. Smith-related noise, so I'm a bit sketchy on that one.

Tame crowd in Section 345. Except for the two guys who proudly wore Jacksonville jerseys and were hit with quite a few snowballs.

Best line from me (after Ron called the Back Judge an asshole): "Why, that would be Mr. Asshole to you." Several people laughed at that. Not sure why. I'll be here all week, try the veal.

Best line from a random (at the end of the first quarter, apparently his first game): "Is it halftime?"

Oddest Browns jersey: Not many visible jerseys. But two rows in front of me, an adult was wearing a Looney Tunes jacket. I love Looney Tunes, but it looked out of place on an adult.

Best shirt: "Hines Ward is a little bitch" b/w "Puck Fittsburgh".

No in-game purchases for me. I shared a couple of beers with Ron and by God, he brought in a flask containing Crown Royal. Happy days.

The Village Idiot, Jeff Tanchak, had microphone problems for his bit. Tech crew needs to get on that. There are two games left! "It's cold, people."

Best Browns play: I think Braylon Edwards second TD was nice. The defender fell down and Frye zipped one in there on a post pattern for six points.

Not many boas, but lots of people sported that giveaway on their heads.

Best Fan Cam picture: I liked the two guys who were dressed as super-sized "Charlie's Fryes".

Worst stat: Cannot stress it enough. Garrard for a 28-yard run on a third-and-19 with 2:09 left. Insert dagger.

2nd worst stat: I believe the Browns ran 11 times on first down in the first half. Somehow that translated to a 14-3 lead.

3rd worse stat: The Browns rushed for 3.1 per attempt.

The Browns played an OK game. Roye was outstanding and Frye was good. Droughns had 89 yards, but didn't average three a carry. We also gave up a 100-yard rusher and let another backup QB, Garrard, beat us. And Edwards ripped up us knee, so that kinda sucked. The Browns lose 20-14, go to 4-8, and visit the dreaded Bengals next week.

Meal of Links

John Lennon's death was preceded by some unfortunate events that caused him to be DOA. We were watching "Monday Night Football" when Cosell broke the news.

Tom Delay had his conspiracy charge tossed out. But they kept the money laundering charges open. And that means he doesn't get his leadership position back. He'll just have to suck on it and like it.

All of the Westin hotels have banned smoking. That covers the USA, Canada and the Caribbean.

Exercise Yard

The bowl winners and losers in the matchups. Oregon took a huge hit.

Visitor

19 Across: Michael of "A Fish Called Wanda" (5 letters) Answer: Palin

Went to Crazy Rita's in Lakewood last night. Walk in and who's playing? Why, it's Zoo Station, the local U2 cover band. They were pretty good, but the crowd was virtually ignoring them. I believe I heard the singer say after one song, which garnered zip reaction, "Are you frozen shut?" I must say, it was awfully cold outside. Very biting. And typically wintry.

Food there is pretty good. With a chip order, you can sample all of their salsas, which isn't a bad deal, because it prevents the chance of making a mistake by ordering something not so good. Lots of TVs, too. It's in the old Pickle Bill's on Detroit.

Meal of Links

While being absolutely bored in line at Giant Eagle, I counted at least five gossip rags that had Simpson and Lachey on their covers. All I got from their shows was he didn't have much talent and she was dumb.

I got to see "Santa Claus is Comin' to Town" last night while drinking. Burgermeister Meisterburger is still a tough S.O.B., but that Winter Warlock sure melted easily, didn't he? And why a penguin as a henchman? He certainly can't carry anything. I'm surprised it debuted in 1970. I thought it was older.

I guess "Aeon Flux" is bad. But headline writers are having a field day: "Acid re "Flux", "future schlock", "Flux sucks"' "Empty-Headed Failure" and "exercise in stupidity". Wow.

Exercise Yard

I don't have anything sports related, so let's drop in on "Overheard in New York". At Least She Said, "Please"? reminds me of that time a guy flipped out at Quizno's because they kept asking the usual questions. His reply, "JUST THE SANDWICH."

Visitor

38 Down: 1985 A.L. home run champ Evans (7 letters) Answer: Darrell

I went to the Cleveland State game with my Dad last night. They claimed there were 1330 people in attendance, but with LeBron playing down the street, I don't think that was accurate. It was one of the worst games I've seen up close. Cleveland State had a stretch in the first half where they did not score for over 8 minutes (and yet only trailed by 4!), then followed that basket with another 2-minute stretch of silence.

Central Michigan had the worst offensive display imaginable. No inside game and a perimeter game that was horrid. Central attempted only 14 shots in the first half, because of double-digit turnovers. Then they shot 22% in the second half. Yikes.

Hey, I'm happy CSU beat a Division I team for a change. They won, 56-43. But the popcorn was awful and my pretzel lacked the basic qualities of what a pretzel should contain. Boy, I have a dilemma next week. Watching CSU-Albany or going to U2.

Meal of Links

The Top 50 Independent Films. There are some great ones on this list. Glad to see personal fave "Stranger Than Paradise" made it. The scenes capturing the quintessential Cleveland winter make you cold just by viewing them. "Reservoir Dogs" is a deserving Number One.

You can make environmentally responsible choices when it comes to buying fish or dining out. It is the "Seafood Wallet Card". And I knew grouper would be in the red. Damn.

Here is a guy who humps things. Enough said.

Exercise Yard

I cannot win with the sports teams I root for. The Boston Bruins have made me angry by trading Joe Thornton, their captain. They still haven't forgiven this guy for the Montreal playoff in 2004 and I'm not sure they wanted him back after the strike. They gave him a three-year deal instead of five, because in the end, it was easier to move him. They won tonight and for the sake of the front office, they better win more.

Visitor

16 Across: Actress Lindsay (5 letters) Answer: Lohan

Last night, I went with a friend to see "The Ice Harvest". Kind of a dark movie. Not only in humor, but in lighting, as well. The movie was just OK. Didn't help that I could see a microphone boom four different times either, that's just sloppy filmmaking. Could see this plot developing a mile away. Oliver Platt was pretty good in this movie, probably better than Johnny Cusack or Billy Bob.

While at Crocker, we sort of did a mini pub crawl. Blake's has expensive drinks, as we just missed happy hour. Geez, I thought I was at the House of Blues. Three drinks, not rounds, cost over $21. And I'm used to the "hard pour", so it felt like it was goin' down like water, because it probably was. We didn't eat there. Went to Claddagh and it's tough finding something to eat there, because it all looked so bland. We had some beers and some pub fries. We ended up at Champps for the Steelers-Colts game. By that time, I was on Corona Light. But we had some sort of Asian crap on a stick or something. And the hot and spicy sauce for the Asian stuff was really good. I was glad I ate something.

Meal of Links

Duke Cunningham finally admits to bribery charges. Geez, he took a lot of stuff. I think that Rolls was a hint that the gettin' was good.

Michael Philip Jagger and the boys are going to perform at the Super Bowl. They toured everywhere but here. BTW, Queen hits Cleveland in March 2006.

W finally addresses illegal immigration. Men on horseback?

Exercise Yard

The Mets are keeping busy by signing Billy Wagner. With he and B.J. Ryan now signed elsewhere, the Tribe should be entering the closer sweepstakes pretty soon.

Visitor

39 Across: Senator Kennedy (3 letters) Answer: Ted

I finally had my doors put in the correct way today. Thanks for all the prayers, as the thermometer rose to the high 60's this afternoon. Perfect weather for installation activity. Success, finally.

I decided to take advantage of the weather earlier today by going downtown this morning for a walk. I haven't worked down there in quite a while, but my God, the Innnerbelt was a mess this morning, as everyone seemingly forgot how to drive over the holiday. It was backed up past Fulton. Not sure what was going on. But they were tearing up Euclid for those insipid bus lanes, as well.

Meal of Links

The Rock Hall announces the 2006 inductees. Cannot quibble with any of them: The Sex Pistols (may have flamed out early, but oh, my...), Black Sabbath (Ozzy...finally), Miles Davis ("Miles is back!"), Blondie (should be in there), and Lynyrd Skynyrd (really good Southern rock). They are all deserving, I think.

You should probably check out "Iconoclasts" on Sundance. I have seen the first two, Samuel L. Jackson-Bill Russell and Tom Ford-Jeff Koons. Pretty good stuff. Batali on Stipe sounds interesting.

It is Cyber Monday. Are these deals that good? "Free Shipping" is used all the time as a lure, isn't it? All I know is Nordstrom has a Go-Go's video remix of "Our Lips Are Sealed" on their site.

Exercise Yard

Michael Irvin uses the old "my car, but it ain't my pipe" defense. I'm sure the media will "keep up the intensity" on this one.

Visitor

10 Across: Designer Wang (4 letters) Answer: Vera

Not much to say about today's game, except Paul made some excellent gyros. Some really strange moves in this one. The last 45 seconds of the first half allowed me to use many expletives, as the Browns, once again, had awful clock management. They huddled up at the 42-second mark and ran their next play with 12 seconds left. From inside the Viking 5. Amazingly inept, as they still had a timeout left. Result was a field goal. In the second half, Charlie Frye entered the game for one play and threw an awful interception and went back to the bench for the rest of the game, confusing the hell out of anyone watching. A most disturbing loss, as the Vikings beat the Browns, 24-12. My gut feeling tells me we still suck.

Meal of Links

Godiva brings back chocolate at $120/lb. That better be really, really good chocolate.

They found a guy suspected of stealing $200,000 worth of Legos from Target stores out west. You'd think he would have built a hideaway with that many.

No matter how crowded the malls are on Black Friday, no matter how these stores suck you in to get mediocre bargains, no matter how much money you spent that day, it's time for the annual article that tells us overall sales were not that good. Every year, it's the same cycle.

Exercise Yard

Not a sport, but here is the story of the woman who runs PartyPoker.net. You know, the one with annoying pop-up ads.

Visitor

None, it's Sunday.

Tom Jones thinks he's a rock star. No shit. I wouldn't necessarily put him in that category. I'd slot him more in the "entertainer" category, because his style is more of a revue kind of show. Limited banter and we are right into the next song. Keep things moving briskly. Here's the scoop on Wednesday's show at the House of Blues.

Audience was about 70% women. No walkers, but I think I saw an iron lung. EMS was on call at the entrance. I admit he did have a nice video introduction leading up to his stage entrance, lending to his "rock star" image. Then he came out and sang a hip-hop flavored song...about himself! Now that's a cocky rock star attitude. I hadn't really paid attention to the guy since "Mars Attacks!", so I had no idea how he looked. He was a bit chunkier than I recall, looked Botoxed to the hilt, sported a Van Dyke, and wore all black. Although I think his slacks were Sansabelts. When the spotlight hit him a certain way, he resembled Satan.

He had 11 folks in the band: 4 horns, bass, lead guitar, keyboardist, drummer, and 3 backup singers. My new dream job is to be in his horn section. They do their own choreography, sing backup on occasion, and take breaks during the show. My kind of gig. I say that Tom Jones still has the voice, although the backups help out with the high notes. But his dancing (or should I say gyrating) has taken a hit. I estimate his vertical leap is, oh, about 2 inches. And he does some weird monster-type dance that I think I've perfected in a scant 36 hours of practice.

And the women still throw their underwear on stage. Come on, the guy is 65 years old now. But he really does not acknowledge it much anymore. I think only one time did he wipe his brow with one. When the rest landed on stage, he was more concerned with moving it out of the way for his monster dance. I think it's a combination of it being old hat and the fact that he can't bend down anymore.

Having said all that, it was a pretty good show. Started at 9:00, I was in my car at 10:38. Sang all the songs you'd think he'd sing: "What's New, Pussycat?", "Delilah", "Green, Green Grass of Home", "She's A Lady", "It's Not Unusual", "Help Yourself" and, of course, he closed with Prince's "Kiss". However, he did not sing "The Duck Dodgers Theme" or "I (Who Have Nothing)". What else? Oh, he also sang "Mama Told Me Not To Come", "You Can Leave Your Hat On" and something called "Sexbomb".

Meal of Links

I am a Johnny Cash freak, so I was anxious to see "Walk The Line". I went yesterday before Thanksgiving dinner. Terrific performances by Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon. Joaquin had the style down pretty good. But Johnny Cash is such a compelling figure to me, I'm not sure the movie got to the guy's soul. Although it was OK, it seemed like it was series of vignettes strung together without much depth. Music was good, and I was happy to hear two of my favorites, "Get Rhythm" and "Cocaine Blues", the latter from Folsom.

Today is "Black Friday". So:

"When Black Friday comes
I'll stand down by the door
And catch the grey men when they
Dive from the fourteenth floor"

In this civilized nation, why do we still execute people?

Exercise Yard


















George Best passed away today. You have to understand that when I was a kid, when it came to soccer, Americans knew Pele. And Georgie Best.

"I've spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered."--George Best, 1946-2005

Visitor

48 Across: Only hit song for which title and artist are palindromes (3 letters) Answer: SOS by ABBA. (Today's Friday puzzle may have been the easiest in several years. A softball to the stay-at-home holiday crowd.)

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

I think Mariah Carey has legs...and knows how to use them.

But has there ever been a worse awards show than the American Music Awards? This event has been moved from January when no one cared to Thanksgiving week where even more people do not care. I bet, at most, there might have been 10-15 performances that were somewhat memorable during this show's history. I seem to vaguely remember Prince tearing it up one year. Even the Grammys, which suck now, are better than this effort.

Meal of Links

You can now drink later in the pubs of Britain and Wales. Rejoice, ye drunken yobs.

Leave it to Roger Ebert to, once again, trash a movie with superb writing skill. This time it is "Just Friends".

The Butterball Turkey Talk-Line can help with all of your turkey troubles. But it can't do anything about the turkey sitting next to you at the table.

Exercise Yard

Now that's what I call an interesting trade. The Sox traded Aaron Rowand for Jim Thome. It's obvious Thome gets the money of Frank Thomas and Paul Konerko and they may have a little bit left over, as they get some cash from Philly. And Rowand will take over centerfield for the Phils. It all depends on Thome's back to determine the future of the deal.

Visitor

30 Across: Blue Moon of '60s-'70s baseball (4 letters) Answer: Odom

I don't normally chew bubble gum, but I had some Dubble Bubble at work today. For those who haven't had it lately, it kinda sucked.

Since the weather turned cold, I guess I have to throw long underwear at Tom Jones tomorrow at the House of Blues. I'm hoping it's fun, but I'll be thinking of my Mom while I'm there, because she was a major nutjob when it came to that guy. I think I'll be helping the old ladies down there through the snow.

Meal of Links

The Cars reform without Ric Ocasek. The substitute Ocasek is Todd Rundgren! As Todd says, ya gotta pay the bills.

Tonight brings us the final "Nightline" with Ted Koppel. I recall when this was the "Iran Hostage Show" when it first started. We laughed and said what if it gets to Day 100? We were young and fairly stupid back then.

There is a shortage of physics teachers in the UK. Who's gonna teach the kids the Pauli exclusion principle? Pascal and Newton aren't exactly thrilled either.

Exercise Yard

Sepp Blatter wants to ban national anthems at soccer matches. It won't happen, no matter how many folks boo during the opponent's anthem.

Visitor

24 Down: Thom of footwear (4 letters) Answer: McAn

Randomness from today's Browns home game:

Gale was today's special guest. Browns Version 2.3 has to make up for last Sunday night's debacle against the Steelers, where they were manhandled for most of the game. The opponent: The Miami Dolphins in a "Squish the Fish" special.

The weather for November was fantastic. Plenty of sunshine and temps in the mid-fifties. Actually, it was great to steal a nice day this late in November.

Today's giveaway: Don't have to worry about this anymore, it isn't happening.

Not many smells today. Mostly the Miami offense and the area under the Shoreway on West 3rd had a slight pungent odor.

The Browns did what they needed to do to win today. Big time run by Reuben Droughns out of the gate ("Run, Reuben, Run"). Only one INT and that was from Charlie Frye, but it wasn't his fault. Braylon Edwards got the damn ball and did a lot. Defense played well, but the Miami offense stunk. To show you how out of it I was, I thought Gus Frerotte was playing the whole game, until he actually entered the game late in the third quarter. The immortal Sage Rosenfels was quite awful as the Miami starter.

The G.E. Smith Band (my favorite) was there. Might be the last year for the boys, as they typically get shorter and shorter shrift as the calendar progresses.

Tame crowd in Section 345. Except for the guy a few rows back who decided to pee in the stands.

Best exchange. Fan cam showed an African-American wearing a brown afro wig. Gale: "I hope that's a wig." Me: "I hope that's a guy."

Best line from me (after the game at Fox and Hound): "Oh, look. They have six barbecue sauces that could describe me at any given time. Why they have Sweet & Bold, Mild, Gold, Hot & Spicy, and Classic." I forgot the last one, too many beers.

Best line from a random (TIE): "I gotta take a poop." and "All of a sudden the guy behind me says what's that noise? It sounds like someone peeing."

Oddest Browns jersey: Damn, there was one that stuck out, but I forgot that, as well. I'll have to go with the Dolphins: 26 L. Smith.

Best shirt: I liked my Pearl Jam shirt today. "9 out of 10 kids prefer crayons to guns." Yes, I have fun, while sending a message.

No in-game purchases for me. Gale got me a pretzel and I think I hogged most of her popcorn.

The Village Idiot, Jeff Tanchak, had microphone problems for his bit. Again! The best item about him was on 19 Action News this morning, when Sharon Reed covered her coffee because Tanchak was nearby. She said, "You know how I am about germs, and well, you were spraying."

Best Browns play: Droughns 75-yard run was tops. But Frye's mad scramble, where he reversed field, almost fell, continued rolling right and then fired over the middle to Edwards for 15 yards deserved mention.

Boas were in evidence today, but the day-glo orange hats among the men showed up. Hunting season must start soon.

Best Fan Cam picture: An obvious drunk, who was dancing poorly and did not know he was on.

Worst stat: In a game where the Dolphins should have run the ball 50 times, they only ran 25 times and still averaged 5.6 per carry. Because what can't we do? Bueller? Anyone? We can't stop the run. There is no rule that says you can't run on every down.

2nd worst stat: Sage Rosenfels was 5 of 10 for 14 yards. Yes, it was that bad.

3rd worse stat: The Dolphins lost three defenders on a single Browns drive in the second quarter.

The Browns played a decent home game for a change. They took command early, made very few mistakes (1 turnover, 5 penalties), and hung on for a relatively easy win. A shutout is always a good thing. The Browns win 22-0, go to 4-6, and visit Minnehaha next week.

Meal of Links

I watched "Serpico" this evening. That scene, at the end, where he gets his gold shield followed by that damn theme music, gets me every time.

Bush says Murtha's not a bad guy. The good cop, bad cop act is getting old with this administration.

Mayor Daley wants the Chicago schools to be open six days a week. Loverboy starts work on a new song.

Exercise Yard

I saw "Pretty Boy" Floyd Mayweather beat Sharmba Mitchell with a devastating body shot on HBO Boxing last night. It's rare when it happens at a big-time level, but I've seen three in the last couple of years.

Visitor

None, a glorious Browns Sunday.

At The Bart tonight was the start of Cleveland State's hoops season. My friend Eric and I went to the opener. The highlight when we go is never the game, but the trip afterward to Sokolowski's University Inn. Anyhow, tonight's opponent was the Division II Rattlers of Florida A&M. FAMU has the distinction of being one of our nation's HBCUs (Historically Black Colleges and Universities). Cleveland State is also an HBCU, an Historically Basketball-Challenged University, so it makes for an even matchup.

Tonight's notes:

Our favorite Vikette has apparently turned pro.

The male cheerleader who most annoys my Dad, is back for what I think must be his 8th year.

One of CSU's "Restaurant Partners" is a "Caribbean/Hungarian Restaurant". Having problems digesting this one.

The mascot, Vike, now has a big wheel, instead of "tiny bike".

The band played a new song, "American Idiot"!!! Not really, it was that modern hit, "Day Tripper".

We saw a huge, young girl simultaneously eating pizza and cake. Health issues coming.

No fan contests, except for the "Yell the loudest and get a pizza" debacle. Typically won by people who look like they have already eaten on the way in.

And, of course, the scoreboard was all fouled up.

FAMU afforded the opportunity for some good commentary. Their coach looked like the old baseball player, Mickey Hatcher. If the crowd is shouting "Ru Paul" when you come to the foul line, shouldn't you change your appearance? The backup point guard looked like a ninth-grader. And they had a guy named Tony (not Terry) Tate, who brought "The Pain Train" by hitting clutch foul shots down the stretch.

Then there was the game. You should never lose to a D2 school at home. Especially in your home opener. Especially coming off consecutive 4-25 and 9-17 seasons. To use one of my favorite Browns phrases, "We suck." The Vikings lost, 68-66. Same old stuff. 38% shooting, 22 turnovers and 22 fouls. Off to North Carolina on Tuesday. I would suggest that they duck.

But Sokolowski's was excellent. And the Bluth Family from "Arrested Development" was there, just like last year. When I know I'm going there, I don't eat a lot beforehand. I had soup at 11:00 a.m as a prep. So I could garbage up on salisbury steak. Fetal position and coma ensuing.

Meal of Links

Man, it was like Roller Derby and Wrestling in the US House last night. About a little thing called Iraq.

The Miss America pageant seems to be going down in flames. Perhaps if it were a reality show, people would watch.

If you alter the risk factors, you might be able to prevent cancer. Cutting out smoking is the obvious one.

Exercise Yard

Not much to say about the OSU-Michigan game. The Wolverines ran for only 32 yards, played a prevent defense, blew it late and lost, 26-21. Lloyd Carr is turning into John Cooper and is 1-4 against Jim Tressel.

Visitor

35 Down: "I pity the fool" speaker (3 letters) Answer: Mr. T

If you want to get up at 5:00 a.m. or earlier on the Friday after Thanksgiving, here are the Black Friday ads. I waited until 5:00 p.m. last year to go to Best Buy (meaning no mall traffic). I was in and out in 20 minutes. I didn't need a $9 TV (which is $10 this year at CompUSA, BTW), but the software I wanted was still there. Matter of fact, that software, Spy Sweeper, is at Office Max this year for FREE (after rebate). Arrested Development DVD is $14.99 (I assume it's Season 2) at Best Buy. Not that I would want that or anything. And, of course, Walgreen's has candy and Planters peanuts for 99 cent.

Meal of Links

Clark, Texas, renames itself DISH, Texas. Free TV for everyone.

The Top 40 Bands in America. Good to see Kings of Leon in there.

Ladies and gentlemen, the amazing soccer juggling of Mr. Woo. I actually watched all 6:51 of it. I am an idiot.

Exercise Yard

"Jawgate" is still moving along. Two Bears fight at an FBI installation, where you can shoot guns, drink and break jaws, I guess.

Visitor

23 Across: Celeb with a mansion (3 letters) Answer: Hef

Looks like Bob Woodward finds himself embroiled in the CIA leak case. The ubiquitous "senior administration official" leaked this info to Woodward before Libby heard about it. Therefore, Libby's camp is ecstatic, if only for a short time, because they think they may have found an escape hatch in their case. The right is happy because Woodward is taking some hits. The press is happy because it looks like Cheney might be involved, after all.

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Bush tells China "Be like your neighbors." They haven't stopped laughing yet.

I stumbled upon "Hudson Hawk" the other day. There are actually very few of us who like this flick. "I've got myself a new goal...World Domination!"

The U.S. Army is sacking the "Army of One" ad campaign.

Exercise Yard

Paul Maguire has a profile on MySpace.com. His heroes inlcude "any running back with moving feet."

Visitor

21 Across: Pop's Christina (8 letters) Answer: Aguilera

The Senate tells Bush to outline his plan for a successful mission in Iraq. The D's wanted him to have a timetable for troop withdrawal. It shows that the R's are getting a bit antsy over the policies in Iraq. Not sure there will be a schedule for withdrawal for at least 12 months.

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Lennon's killer admits nothing would have stopped him. Hated him for a long time.

Hair cloning? Where do I sign up?

The worst album covers of all time. I own two of these. And I'm not saying which two.

Exercise Yard

Baseball has a new steroids policy that is really tough. 50 games, 100 games, lifetime ban for the first three offenses.

Visitor

50 Down: Actress Sorvino (4 letters) Answer: Mira

Yes, they are laughing at us.

What a difference in watching the two local teams yesterday. The Cavs blew a huge lead against Orlando, but gutted out an overtime win. The Browns, on the other hand, spit the bit early and lost to the Steelers.

It's probably time for Charlie Frye to take over at QB. Let him take his lumps and see what we have here. Dilfer just doesn't have it and no use wasting our breath about him. He was brought in to be a bridge to the next guy and it was a shorter span than we thought. The other disturbing trend I see is that Romeo Crennel leaves a lot to be desired when it comes to in-game management. We are down 27-7 early in the fourth quarter and we are huddling after each play. Good grief. How about trying a hurry-up as a change of pace? We were not going to win, but hey, let's give it a shot.

Meal of Links

NBC tells Martha Stewart, "You're fired." Maybe the networks will cut back on their reality offerings. They should funnel the money into the better ones and quit developing new ones.

Bush is stepping up the attacks on his war critics. I think it's a battle he can't win, especially with the way the "new press" is behaving in DC.

This should bother everyone. Sony has decided to spy on CD buyers. Seems the software communicates over the Internet from a PC playing the CD, to a computer of Sony's in NC. Outrageous.

Exercise Yard

I see the wrestler Eddie Guerrero died. All I can think of is "Latino Heat". Will Paul Bearer be in attendance?

Visitor

48 Across: Shakespeare's Prince of Denmark (6 letters) Answer: Hamlet

Since it's Sunday, I'd like everyone to pray to their favorite deity for me. My door is scheduled to be re-installed on 11/28 and I don't want anything to happen, like a blizzard, to postpone this again. Thanks for your support.

As I was out raking leaves this morning about 7:30, I finally met my neighbor from across the street. She's only lived there 7 years. City life is grand, ain't it?

I don't want to relive the debacle of the Plain Dealer putting Dennis Kucinich on the front page of the Sunday paper. But I found it odd that Kate Bush, of all people, seemed to get the royal treatment in the Arts section this past week. A large photo and a discography with the accompanying article. Don't get me wrong, I like her, but I can't believe anyone under 25 knew who she was. Of course, they don't read the paper, but I was mystified that she got that kind of play. What's next, an XTC feature? Again, a great band, but not exactly charttoppers.

Meal of Links

Does anyone you know have a grille pet? BTW, add the opossum to the list of animals now living in my neighborhood.

I think this piece on Google gives us some neat insight into what's going on at that company.

"Chick flicks. Get your chick flicks right here."

Exercise Yard

I guess this is not really a sport, but another addicting game. It's Escapa.

Visitor

None, it's a prime time Cleveland sports Sunday.

Yesterday's horoscope (a three-star day, BTW): Tonight: It might be a while before you can relax. OK, I get that. But while I was at Alesci's last night, we got to horse around with Joe the Scalper's kids. When they go to the jukebox and request "Southern Man" by Neil Young, that is pretty cool. Anyhow, later on, there was this woman (consensus, an alcoholic) who showed up and she was waving a dollar to most of the men there. It was not crowded, but I believe she was showing the dollar and saying she would do anything for some cigs and a drink. Kind of like three guys who'll do anything for a buck. As a matter of fact, she resembled the other brother, Darryl. At first, I was a bit put off because she didn't come by me.

Eventually, she made it into my area and by this time everyone, including myself and my cousin Gale, was telling her to hit the road. So, of course, we start arguing. Why? I have no idea. During the argument, I was able to determine that she was old, drunk, and she claimed she was a veteran from Fort Campbell. Something about her son was also included. Understand, Gale is to my left, drunken female vet is several feet to my right. Then it happened. Just as Gale, who was getting all frosty herself, said, "Just go away." Out of nowhere, here comes a cup of water tossed in which direction? Why yes, that would be mine. Who knows who the intended target was, but if it was me, their aim at Fort Campbell is pretty good. Estimates indicate that if the cup contained 16 ounces, oh, about 15.5 of them wound up on me. Of course, then everyone springs into action, and our friend was last seen in the middle of traffic on East 9th, perhaps indicating that she was number one to those driving by.

No one was hurt and admittedly, it was kinda funny after the initial drenching. I mean the woman, especially if she was a Vet, had some problems and I hope she gets some help. And I like Vets, because they sacrifice a whole lot for us and really Veterans Day seems to have faded along with others, such as Flag Day and Pearl Harbor Day. However, I'd like to see the surveillance video but I'm not happy, because it's filmed from my bad side. I'd like to see that in slo-mo and have the water coming at me with some "Six Million Dollar Man" overdubbing.

So, to recap, while trying to relax, I spent my Veterans Day arguing with an old, drunken female vet from Fort Campbell, who threw water on me. God bless America.

Meal of Links

I saw "Capote" earlier today. Really a good movie, about how Truman Capote came to write "In Cold Blood". Good story about how Capote used the murderers to get what he needed, and how the murderers tried to use Capote to paint a more sympathetic picture of them. Easily an Oscar nomination for Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Incredibly, "Arrested Development" finally gets the boot. Another gem on Fox that was completely mishandled. Why, if I ran that network...

Karl Malone relates how tough it was to get through government channels to help with Hurricane Katrina. He chose to provide help in Mississippi and was, at first, told to hit the road.

Exercise Yard

The old ball coach beats his former team, Florida. The legend continues.

Visitor

22 Across: Adlai's running mate (5 letters) Answer: Estes