Well it's 357 days til Christmas and no, I didn't wind up in a ditch. I finally recovered from the personal disaster that was New Year's Eve. I had way too much to drink, which resulted in all sorts of "Amateur Night" antics. You know, spilling other people's drinks, falling into tables, drunk-dialing, etc. You name it, I probably did it. I think it finally sunk into me that there might be issues when I was being driven back towards the Happy Dog at the end of the evening.

Me: "I'm parked on the other side of Detroit, facing east."
My Designated Driver: "Um, we're driving your car right now."
Me: "Oh." or something as profound.

So, while I think I had fun as it was happening, I have to apologize to everyone involved. Not one of my shining moments.

While I was recovering from a major hangover, I did last through the first half of Sunday's Browns game. Special guest was my brother, Jeff. Browns Version 2.3 was coming off a dud of a game against the Steelers. The opponent: The Baltimore Ravens. I am in pain, let's see if I can make it.

The weather was great for the New Year. A bit overcast and the temperature was about 40 degrees.

The giveaway: None, unless you wanted to fill out MBNA applications.

Not many smells, except that of the Browns defense, offense and special teams in the first half. Special teams saved our bacon in the second half.

The Browns and Ravens contributed to the worst half of football I've seen in a long time. Horrible offenses, too many penalties and not a whole hell of a lot was happening.

The G.E. Smith Band was AWOL. Obviously, a private party paid more then this gig.

Tame crowd in Section 345. I estimate 20,000 no shows and it seemed like the folks were too tired to cheer or make any sort of noise.

Best line (from Jeff in the second quarter): "It's pretty bad when the opening kickoff is your best play."

Best line (from me): "Let's leave." I said this at the half, after watching that 30 minutes of awfulness. Things were not that much better in half number two. The Browns hung in there, but were very lucky to win.

Oddest Browns jersey: 53 UNCK.

Best shirt: "Fuck Modell". Enough said.

I actually bought a $4 hot dog that wasn't bad.

The Village Idiot, Jeff Tanchak, got his mike problems fixed and wished everyone a "Happy New Year".

Best Browns play: In person, none. Northcutt's punt return after I got home.

Best Fan Cam picture: The kid who basically turned to his Dad and said, "Hey look, we're on the Jumbotron."

Worst stat: The Browns had 9 yards on their first 12 plays.

2nd worst stat: The Ravens were 4-18 on third downs. Truly exciting football.

3rd worse stat: The Browns rushing offense totalled 54 yards on 23 carries.

The Browns somehow won this one. A long kickoff return by Cribbs set up the first TD and Northcutt took a punt back for the second TD. In a space of 90 seconds. Much like the Bears game, the Browns played horribly and still came out with a win. They beat the Ravens, 20-16, to finish the season at 6-10. Probably right where they should have finished.

Meal of Links

Tom Shales talks about Dick Clark hosting New Year's Eve. Didn't see it, as I was subjected to Carson Daly on NBC.

Looks like Independence Air didn't make it. I flew them to FLA last year and was quite satisfied. Pretty cool planes and Chuck Berry gave us the safety tips. But I flew really cheap and I'm guessing they couldn't keep up with the costs of running an airline.

"My boy, Blue." passed away.

Exercise Yard

The day after the NFL season ends, and that means coaches are fired. In Minnesota, it looked like they fired Mike Tice on the field, they did it so quick, not even waiting for Monday. The Phil Savage Watch is still on in Cleveland.

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58 Across: "Wascally wabbit" hunter (9 letters) Answer: Elmer Fudd