See how Lord Football rules over everyone. Today, I found myself watching "The Reading of the Schedules". Yes, an ESPN show which was built around the releasing of this fall's NFL schedule. Maybe.

Even with the present lockout and perhaps some cancelled games later in the fall, Lord Football maintains his grip on our lives. The Browns finally get a Holmgren Factor when it comes to the schedule. Three of the first four games at home. Five of the last six games in the division, so the Browns are not of it by the end of September. Christmas against the Ravens, New Year's with the Steelers. Hardly any travel after October. Only one December and one January game at home. Could help a late season short passing game.

Meal of Links

I finally got to see Colin Quinn's Broadway show, "Long Story Short" on HBO. I gotta say, it surprised me how funny this was. I'm not saying I was on the floor, but the laughs were plentiful and it was very smart. Good stuff.

Cubes decides to get rid of some of his entertainment holdings. Seeking offers for Landmark Theatres and Magnolia Pictures.

Hitch takes on one of his favorite topics. The Royal Family. His advice to Kate Middleton? Run!

Dairy-free frozen dessert. Looks good. Some Giant Eagles have it. Of course, none near the city.

Castro resigns. You are now free to move about the country. Cubans can buy property again.

How many times have I seen this guy on a Sunday night? Catching up with Wendell Pierce.

Ten reasons to be still pissed off about the BP Oil Disaster. There's that phrase, "tar balls", again.

Versus is going to get a new name. Something with NBC in it, I'm sure.

Exercise Yard

The Indianapolis 500 has something unique this year. Four women will try to qualify.

Visitor

7 Down: College football immortal Amos Alonzo _____ (5 letters) Answer: Stagg

The anniversary of the BP oil spill is around the corner. I've been reading some conflicting things about where all the BP money went. First off, was the excellent Spillionaires article that got some attention. It implies St. Bernard Parish used BP as a makeup for Katrina. This got my attention: "Flush with cash from cleanup and claims, many fishermen bought new toys, boats and trucks. Sales at the nearest Chevrolet dealer rose 41 percent."

The AP reported local governments bought items not associated with cleanup activities with BP money.

Others are not getting compensated. And attorneys general are getting involved.

Meal of Links

Maybe not the death blow to online poker in the U.S. But close. This seems like an effort to sort of clean up online poker stateside before legalizing it. But it's all very confusing.

Matt Taibbi with another gem. Per Gale, his Imus appearance. Complete with a classic Kenneth "I'm a proper citizen" Dahlberg reference from "All The President's Men".

The trouble with Twitter. Now on their third CEO in three years. Plus horrible ad revenues means they still haven't figured out how to make money off the thing.

Drug songs. Three listens worth it: Rick James, The La's and Tom Petty.

This article actually hooked me. The current state of the Royal Family.

NBA playoffs start tomorrow. Shitty weather allows for max viewing opportunities. Leitch on Carmelo.

iRobot. Beyond the Roomba.

Exercise Yard

Coco's fro.

Visitor

57 Across: University of Cincinnati team (8 letters) Answer: Bearcats

As the World Cup matches have developed, today was the best stay-away-from work day on the schedule, thus far. Serbia-Germany, USA-Slovenia, England-Algeria. So, Miles, Ken, Juan and I met at the Rusty Barrel in Westlake. I mainly heard about this place from my brother, it's on his mail route, and they do a bangup job. Can't beat the all-you-can-eat-and-drink for $10 during the USA matches.

Miles was the first to arrive this morning. As the token Serbian, he had to get there for the first match between Serbia and Germany at 7:30. I think he may have opened up the place. Whenever the Germans are involved, I think of this:

The Germans



Hell, I had a Bloody Mary in my hand by 7:45. "America, what a country!" Ken was next to arrive and Juan showed up for the US second half, with the luxury of staying for the afternoon England-Algeria match.

The first match ended up Serbia 1, Germany 0. The result was not a stunner, but the guy reffing this match was handing out yellow cards as if he was bribing Cuyahoga County officials. That resulted in the Germans losing their big scorer, Klose, to a red card in the first half. Kudos to ESPN announcer, Robbie Mustoe, who was all over the ref for the calls. It seemed the ref had pre-determined all fouls were bookable offenses, treating any tackle from behind as a yellow card. WTF?

Anyhow, about 2 minutes after Klose leaves, the Germans were still reeling a bit, and the Serbs put in a goal. Oh, they almost tied before the half and played a strong start in the second half. Then Lukas Podolski got to shoot a penalty.

Podolski Misses



That spelled the end for the Germans...oo-o-o-o-oh, the Germans.

BTW, Joe Barton's friend, Hitler, is none too happy about the defeat.

Next up, USA-Slovenia, Slovenia with their Charlie Brownish unis. Remember, Slovaks are not Slovenians. This was a match the US needed to win, because the Slovenia win over Algeria put their group in a hole. Slovenia always has a stout defense, so it was going to be a tough, but winnable match.

Typically, the USA gave up an early goal in the 13th minute. Wow, the Slovenians really need to work on that celebration dance.

Slovenia Scores First...Uh-Oh



Well, they had another first half goal to go up by 2. More bad dancing.

Then the fun started in the second half. Landon Donovan sends an "America, Fuck Yeah!" goal right at the keeper's melon to make it 2-1.

"America, Fuck Yeah!"



Michael Bradley, the coach's son, hustles his ass off for a terrific match-tying goal. Everyone gets fired up after this one went in. Note "Drunken Tears of Joy Guy" on the replay.

"See, Dad, I Can Play."



Then, Maurice Edu appears to have the match-winner late. Everyone goes nuts. Then reality sets in that the goal was disallowed. At first, offsides was mentioned, but then incredulity arises as it was determined a foul was committed.

USA...Hosed



I've looked at these replays a million times, and all I see are Slovenians bearhugging Americans.

"We're Bearhuggin'....We're Bearhuggin'..."


























As you can plainly see, the only American not being held is the goal-scorer, Edu. At least the ref was horribly consistent, as he called a foul on virtually every set piece of the match. Sure, it's a bad call, but the US is just gonna have to suck on it and like it. Of course, Robbie Findley was yellow-carded for a handball that actually hit him in the head. Yeah, the ref was kinda bad. However, the tie didn't kill them, because...

England crapped the bed against Algeria, a 1000-1 shot to win the World Cup.

England Beats Truman




















It's like LeBron's Game 5 over there. No one can believe it. Some comic had a description of English football before the World Cup that goes like this: "When a player puts on an England shirt, it's like when you are driving and you see a police car in the rear-view mirror. All the natural things are things you have to start thinking about and it all goes staccato and difficult." After their first two matches, how true that is.

After that crazy day today, it all comes down to Wednesday's games. If the USA wins, they advance.

Meal of Links

Kids are fickle. Justin Bieber in, Jonas Brothers out.

"Diaperman" died. Interviewer: "Why would a grown man wear a diaper?". Shider: "God loves babies and fools. I'm both." Beautiful.

The reality of living in southernmost Louisiana. "I see this as the beginning of another depression if the rigs and waters don't reopen. We'll lose everything that goes with it: the money, the culture, the traditions that weren't even mine yet."

Exercise Yard

It looks like the ref in today's USA-Slovenia match may not be getting any more assignments this year. For FIFA to act that quickly means he was really bad.

Visitor

37 Across: Three-time Clooney title role (5 letters) Answer: Ocean